Pantherwife No. 4

Last night was long. You know how it is. We vomit and scrub and vomit again. I touch you, hot and clammy. I lay on my back. The dim light presses at my eyes. Your sides heave. My great panther in pain.

Last night was long. I dreamed of whales. I cried out in my sleep. The rabbits listened, quietly. Patiently they waited. My fingers are dark with ink. The world passes slowly.

Last night was long. I rose again and again. I tortured myself with your fever. What else could I do? I am still the Marigold Woman. I still bite at my hands. Today, my back aches. It feels good.

Last night was long. I do not understand this mystery. I am like a queen in cutoffs. I am like a pitcher. I am a tower in the desert. Welcome to the red land, panther lover. I am here. You are here. We are both here.

I watch you sleep. The desert is cold. The abbas are quiet, too. I am glad that you are here.

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